Let us enlighten you once again
Find our emails too long? Read the brief summary below. Have reading skills above a grade 2 level? Skip over the summary, and in our linguistic skills you shall revel.
- Holiday deal - Get Deal
- Holiday film - Watch Film
- Open source apps - View Code
Read on then
To many of you, Christmas is the time to celebrate Santa's bat mitzvah, or Jesus' birthday (which it isn't), or Ricky Martin's birthday (which it is). In Scriberia, Windscribe's magical homeland, we have our own celebration: Scribemas. Every year, Scriberian families gather at home to decorate Scribemas trees with Cat6 cables, old sticks of RAM and beaver dreams. Then, our families congregate around holographic TV's to watch the annual Scriberian Mixed Martial Moose fights in Dolby Atmos 69.1 surround sound. The moose that wins gets to decide the price of the Windscribe Scribemas VPN Deal (see below). Finally, at precisely midnight, our entire population gathers in front of an ice sculpture of Mark Zuckerberg and pees on it in unison. If it doesn't melt completely, we get 4 more years of winter. So you can bet your buttocks we drink a lot beforehand.
For privacy, you see.
So what did the mighty moose decide this year's Scribemas sale would be? Glad you asked! This year the moose read too many marketing books, so the offer is as follows: Until January 3rd, pay us $36 for one month of Windscribe Pro, and we will give you 11 months of Pro for FREE! 12 months of internet privacy for 1/100000th the cost of Santa's dry cleaning bill after kidney stoning his way through 2 billion chimneys! That's not even a deal, that's a steal.
1 Month Pro + 11 Months FREE For $36/year
We've also open sourced the Windscribe apps and extensions, so everyone can see just how good we have been this year! Is that all? Of course not. Christmas wouldn't be the same without us plugging our Scrooge video again. What? You don't like reruns? Then why are you watching Die Hard for the 53rd time?
Regardless of how you celebrate this holiday season, we hope that you have an absolute blast. May you rest well, spend time with the people you love (even if it is just yourself), and may every calorie you consume burn faster than you consume it.
Happy Holidays, With Love,
Team Windscribe
Random Fact
"Nicholas Cage once did magic mushrooms with his cat."
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